Emotional awareness is a key aspect in developing a child’s emotional intelligence, empowering them to express their feelings and manage their emotions more effectively. According to Dr. Laura Markham, a dual-certified child life specialist and clinical psychologist, developing emotional intelligence in kids is critical. As the Chief Clinical Officer of Pickles Group, a nonprofit organization, she walks alongside families. She leads them into difficult discussions of sickness, survival and loss. Her creative practice fosters the development of emotional literacy. It further models reflection, giving children the language to express their emotions in a more productive way.
Dr. Markham’s systematic approach has proven effective in helping children to conduct productive conversations with their feelings. She believes that integrating emotional discussions into daily routines can significantly enhance a child’s capacity to express themselves. It’s one simple but powerful practice that she advocates, which has families report the best and worst parts of their day. This routine promotes positive dialogue and gives kids a chance to process the highs and lows of their day.
During this simple practice, every member of the family takes turns sharing the best part of their day. Then they talk about what sucked the most and their favorite thing. Dr. Markham encourages parents to set the stage for difficult conversations. When they take the first step, parents show their children what it means to express their feelings, while providing them with a safe space to do so.
For instance, I might say, ‘Today was kind of a rollercoaster. I was excited about something in the morning, but then something didn’t go how I expected, and I felt frustrated. I took a walk and felt better by the end of the day. And now, I’m excited to see you and hear about your day,’ Dr. Markham explains.
In her consulting work with families, Dr. Markham has seen firsthand how this proactive routine supports children’s emotional development. She emphasizes that when parents model by sharing their own experiences, children feel supported to come to them with theirs. This practice is so important. More importantly, it empowers parents to be the trusted confidants their kids deserve to have around during the most important transitions of their young lives.
Dr. Kelsey Mora, a proponent of making children more emotionally aware, backs up this tactic with her own childhood experiences. “I didn’t grow up talking about my feelings, but I want to do that with you — because I know it’s important and helpful,” she comments. These sentiments speak to an increasing awareness among parents that emotional intelligence and open communication are essential components of a child’s healthy growth and development.
Dr. Markham’s techniques aren’t restricted by age. Even infant children can get in on this evening bonding space. It’s easy to ask a two-year-old what their favorite part of the day was. This simple gesture helps foster a lifelong appreciation for sharing ideas. Helping kids explore their feelings. Parents should foster a safe place for all kinds of emotions to come out — easily and comfortably.
Even simple statements like ‘I’m feeling a little worried that we’re going to be late for school and work. Let’s work together,’ can help children understand emotions and their impact, explains Dr. Mora. Fostering positive engagement This collaborative approach supports family teamwork and it encourages constructive expression of emotions.
Developing emotional awareness is a lifelong task. One that will take persistence and patience on parents’ parts as well. Creating Reflective Spaces Together sharing daily reflections as a family helps connect each member. They help children come to life’s hurdles with better coping skills and more resilience.