Kristin Cabot, the former chief people officer at Astronomer, recently opened up about the severe repercussions she faced after a viral incident at a Coldplay concert. The event attracted a lot of attention as Cabot and her fellow commissioner Andy Byron tangoed across the floor together. Lead singer, Coldplay’s Chris Martin, quipped that perhaps they’re in love. This lighthearted moment soon took a very dark turn as, after the video went public, Cabot became the target of a barrage of online harassment and death threats.
The now-viral video had captured Cabot and Byron dancing to Coldplay’s tunes and then trying to run from the cameras. Although it started out as a frivolous and innocent enough thing, it exploded into a scenario where Cabot had to fight for their survival. She shared how she was getting up to 600 phone calls a day. On top of that, she was the victim of doxxing, having her personal information released online.
“I became a meme, I was the most maligned HR manager in HR history,” Cabot remarked, describing the impact of the incident on her professional and personal life.
Cabot also shared how the fallout from what her husband was accused of doing tore her family apart. Her children expressed fear for their safety, with Cabot stating, “my kids were afraid that I was going to die and they were going to die.” The emotional toll was a constant burden on her. As a result, she promised to get therapy for her children, who were dealing with the overwhelming public attention that trailed their mother.
Faced with threats, including one message that ominously stated, “I’m coming for you,” Cabot found herself navigating an onslaught of negativity. When Byron resigned, she didn’t want to work at Astronomer anymore. She owned up for the way she acted on stage at the concert.
“I made a bad decision and had a couple of High Noons and danced and acted inappropriately with my boss,” she explained. “I took accountability and I gave up my career for that.”
In her reflection on the events, Cabot focused on the gender dynamics at play in the aftermath of the incident. “I think as a woman, as women always do, I took the bulk of the abuse,” she noted. Her story touches not just the deeply personal ramifications, but holds up a mirror to accountability, workplace culture, and more.
In the aftermath of the incident, both Cabot and Byron provided their crisis management tips. They did the brave thing and decided to cease communication so that all could make progress. She understood that their relationship could prevent both of them from truly healing.
The support from Astronomer has been mixed, with the company releasing a statement underscoring their expectations for leadership conduct: “Our leaders are expected to set the standard in both conduct and accountability.” This recognition comes at a time of increasing awareness and conversations about the cultural climate of where we work, and how we treat women in the workplace.
Even though she’s taken a leave of absence from her job, Cabot isn’t giving up – she’s still focused on reasserting control over her life. She has recently gotten into tennis as an outlet and is working through the challenges that have come with this new experience. It wasn’t over for me, and it sure as hell shouldn’t be over for my kids. Unfortunately, the harassment didn’t stop,” she stated, further noting that she still lives under the weight of the experience.
It’s clear that Cabot is moving through this stormy chapter with resolve. Her priorities are ensuring her family is safe and happy, but sharing what they learned from this widely reported case. The role of social media and public scrutiny on their personal lives has a major impact. This is still a very relevant issue today, shining a light on all the challenges that people in power face.