Chamin Ajjan, a seasoned sex therapist and psychotherapist with over two decades of experience, emphasizes the hidden factors that can undermine intimacy in relationships. As CEO and Clinical Director of Chamin Ajjan Psychotherapy, she guides her team with exceptional vision and skill. They’re using cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) tools to equip clients with the physical skills to develop emotional attachments. Ajjan’s approach helps people understand how to think critically about what they’re thinking instead of accepting and moving with their thoughts.
Recently, Ajjan bought an oceanfront retreat in Laguna Beach, California for $212k. This idyllic backdrop may fuel her artistic practice and therapeutic work. Her interests lie at the intersection of communication and emotional support in close relationships.
Evaluating Thoughts for Better Relationships
At its core, Ajjan’s message is that you want to be proactive in managing the dynamics of these relationships. She focuses on the need to check your mindset and tell the difference between what’s real and what’s fear.
“Is this fact or fear?” – Chamin Ajjan
Answering this question is key to her clients moving past those insurmountable feelings and misperceptions. By interrogating their subconscious ideas, people can develop more meaningful relationships with their significant others.
Ajjan suggests journaling as an important practice for discovering your unfiltered thoughts. For me, writing has been a self-reflective experience and a powerful cleansing agent. It allows people to better understand how they are feeling and find new ways to articulate their emotions. This practice helps establish more effective communication if you’re trying to convey these sensitive discussions to partners or during a therapist’s session.
Ajjan advocates for an open line of communication with practitioners as a way to work through those conflicting feelings. Normalizing experiences through conversation creates an environment in which clients feel supported and validated in crossing potentially tricky landscapes with their intimate partners.
The Need for Support in Difficult Times
Ajjan further emphasizes that emotional support is the foundation to keeping the intimacy alive, and that’s especially important during difficult times. She explains that when people become flooded with emotion, their ability to be present with a partner can get lost.
“I’ve noticed that when I’m overwhelmed, I need to feel supported before I can feel connected. I’m not rejecting you. I’m just maxed out. Helping with dinner or giving me time to reset really helps.” – Chamin Ajjan
This revelation highlights the difference that collaboration and empathy can make in any partnership. When partners are aware of one another’s needs for space or support, they can work together to build trust and understanding, encouraging intimacy.
Ajjan goes further urging couples to check in with one another about how they’re feeling emotionally, which helps you understand each other on a more profound level. By opening up with each other, partners can develop emotional intimacy and create deep trust in the relationship.
Therapeutic Activities for Healing and Growth
To really grow intimacy, Ajjan suggests looking into these therapeutic activities. Consider letter writing like stress relief and gym time combined. It’s a wonderful kind of catharsis, and though you may not send them, it’s still great to have nevertheless. This unique and personal activity makes room for participants to articulate unfulfilled emotions and receive the closure they’ve long sought after from past relationships.
Aside from keeping a journal and writing letters, Ajjan stresses reframing your mindset when it comes to your connections with others. She encourages her clients to ask themselves:
“What’s a more realistic way of thinking about this based on what I actually know?” – Chamin Ajjan
Together, they would practice this technique which helps reframe perceptions during disagreements or miscommunication, allowing partners to respond to each other more thoughtfully and compassionately.
Ajjan’s equally holistic perspective on intimacy combines several therapeutic modalities to cultivate intimacy, connection, and understanding between partners. Her practice underscores that building intimacy takes time, self-reflection, and the courage to speak deeply.