From here, Marisa Fox has started on a truly amazing adventure. She is exposing the shadowy history of her mother whose life was shrouded in intrigue and chicanery. She was born in Warsaw, Poland in 1935. Her mom was only 14 years old when the Nazis began their reign of terror in their home country. She spent her childhood in a small town close to the German border. The trauma of WWII forever changed who she was and the narrative she passed on to her children.
The story opens in this confusing moment where Poland suddenly found itself under Nazi occupation. In Marisa Fox’s case, when she was only 14 years old, her mother was taken from their family’s home. She was dispatched to a forced labor camp, known as Gabersdorf. There, she endured the most horrible conditions, forced to work endless hours in order to supply the necessary free labor that fed the Nazi war machine. Her difficult childhood experiences deeply influenced her view of the world. Thus, even subconsciously, she developed a more attractive narrative to avoid facing the harsh reality.
Perhaps the best account of this comes from Marisa Fox, who heard a very different story from her mother as to her wartime experiences. She told them that they took her away from her sick mom. Then they sent her on a boat to Palestine, where she remained for the rest of the war. In reality, as the Talmudic legend goes, she was stuck back in Poland, caught up in a cycle of resistance and survival.
In adulthood, Marisa Fox’s mother continued to lie about key aspects of her life, including her real name, Hela Hocherman, and her true age. This façade even reached the outermost circle of her life, her children, who equally bought into the false narratives she had built all their lives.
While talking with her daughter, Marisa Ruiz, she makes an observation about her mom’s audacity at that time. “My mother was a badass, even at a young age,” she noted, emphasizing the resilience required to navigate such a perilous environment. Following WWII, Hela became involved in the insurrectionist movement within Palestine. This political movement was absolutely crucial to the founding and subsequent recognition of Israel. In response, she joined a radical Jewish underground group. There, she fought as a spy and saboteur, smuggling weapons, assassinating enemy informants, and orchestrating operations to disrupt the British army.
Financial support from an American uncle helped make Hela’s emigration possible. By the mid-1950s she had gotten married and moved to New York. There, she created a new life for herself with a family, and continued to hide her truth. Despite the stark contrast between her public persona and her private history, Marisa Fox felt compelled to uncover the truth behind her mother’s life story.
As she dove deeper into this process, Marisa wanted to talk to people who had known her mother in those transformative years. “Whenever I would hear about somebody relevant to the story, I would hop on a plane to speak to them,” she shared. As she conducted interviews, one god-awful statistic jumped out at her. So were most of her mother’s peers, equally mystified by Hela’s decision to live a life shrouded in mystery.
A lot of them asked: ‘Do you love your mother?’ because they wanted to make sure I wasn’t out to tell some salacious story,” Marisa explained. This question opened up discovery of the emotional, psychological and spiritual conflict layered inside Hela’s decisions. All of those that were once nearest and dearest to her swore a deep feeling of loyalty to Hela. Simultaneously, though, they faced backlash for confusion surrounding her decision to conceal her history.
Marisa shared how they had long been wondering about what happened to their friend. She noted that we care most about the fact that we love how fierce Hela is, but we’re upset that she betrayed us.
Doing so would be both illuminating and incredibly difficult for Marisa, as her investigation into Hela’s short life would reveal. She recounted questioning her mother about inconsistencies in her story: “I would say to her: ‘Wait a minute, if you were born in 1935 and [the second world war] started in 1939, you would have been four, not 13.’”
Marisa wanted to understand her mother’s personal history. With every new discovery, she needed to change her understanding of the mother she believed to be dead. Her great-aunt provided some insight into Hela’s secretive nature: “Your mother had a hidden identity.” This knowledge came with an ominous word of advice—“You’re not going to like the answers.”